Atlanta Track Club Half-Marathon training begins...

Yesterday was the first run with the ATC for the half-marathon....12 more weeks to go!

I did well. I ran with the novice group (4 miles) and was in the fastest group which was a fluke because I am not a fast runner. It was a success.

What happened to not be a success was that we weren't allowed to wear headphones. They gave us a nice speech about how many deaths are caused each year by runners wearing headphones while they run. Boo.

So I had some time to think about things. Normally I organize what I have to do for work (workaholic symptoms) or think about other things that I have to get done at home.

Yesterday I was stuck thinking about something else. Something that is really sad, devastating, and heartbreaking. The more I thought about it the more my heart broke over the issue. By the time the run was over and I was in the car driving home I was thankful that I had the uninterrupted time alone with my thoughts and with God.

We all need alone time with God. It's renewing and refreshing. For me, yesterday, it was encouraging.

Thank you, LORD, for the ability to run and to spend time with you while doing it.

I never lost my praise

I never lost my praise is a song that Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir sings. While it isn't one of my favorite songs that they have recorded, I do love the message.

At Light on the Hill on Sunday I am speaking about praise based on Psalm 44. I find the psalm interesting because the writer praises God for a little bit and then asks why they are suffering (as a community) when they haven't done anything wrong. The two psalms before it are individual prayers that are similar but this one is a community prayer. It's important that we praise God not only as individuals, but as a community.

The psalm begins by talking about how good God was to those who were before them and makes it sound so common place. Everyone knew about how good God was even if it was before their time. Part of it was their tradition, but part of it was that they knew how to praise God. Even when times weren't great.

I feel like we don't do that--or we don't choose to do that. We praise God when things are great or when we are with like-minded people at a church service like Light on the Hill, but we grumble and complain to the people around us. And then we wonder why God doesn't come quickly.

We need to praise God no matter the circumstances.

I never lost my praise
Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir

Solo 1
I've lost some good friends along life's way
Some loved ones departed in Heaven to stay
But thank God I didn't lose everything
I've lost faith in people who said they care
In the time of my crisis they were never there
But in my disappointment in my season of pain
One thing never wavered one thing never changed

CHORUS
I never lost my hope
I never lost my joy
I never lost my faith
But most of all
I never lost my praise

Solo 2
I've let some blessings slip away
And I lost my focus and went astray
But thank God I didn't lose everything
I've lost possessions that were so dear
And I've lost some battles by walking in fear
But in the midst of my struggle, in my season of pain
One thing never wavered, one thing never changed

Going where the people are

If you live in metro Atlanta you know where the people are...they're sitting in traffic somewhere.

They're sitting in traffic on their way to one of the several malls.

Or they're passing through on one of the several interstates stopping long enough to visit a strip club. The Georgian Bible belt has several churches (seriously it feels like every corner) and enough strip clubs nearly to match.

Atlanta feels like it's a large metropolis of malls. And no substantial public transit to get to them so traffic is a requirement to getting to a mall. Or anywhere.

Once upon a time Christians would go to where the people were. In the place that I choose to worship it's in our DNA--we went to the bridges, the bars, started the shelters, etc, etc. I still go under the bridges but haven't been on a tavern route in a long while. I'm trying to get into the strip club within walking distance from my office but I think God requires more of us, more of me.

Now where do we go? What do we do?

Do we expect people to come to us?

We expect people who need physical things to come to us--shelter, help with a bill, food--but what about the other people? We are comfortable sharing with a certain subculture because they need us for their physical survival. But what about those who don't come to us for welfare services?

The people who are sitting in traffic on their way to malls where they spend themselves more into debt and continue to live unhappy lives (I know I'm generalizing, but still)?

Why aren't we in traffic--on billboards (the cost is an issue, and we would probably just market ourselves instead of share the gospel)? Although I do have some ideas for billboards...

Why aren't we in malls? Andy says we have 'nothing' to sell and wouldn't make enough money. Maybe it's because we're too set on only caring about 'poor' people but everyone needs to know about God, right?

I thought about a fair trade store where we could sell goods from our locations all around the world. Andy, the realist that he is, says it would still cost too much to ship it to the U.S., etc.

So what do we do?

How do we tell them?

Do we care? Or do we live in our lyrical state of only being around like-minded people so we don't have to think about it--and argue about a mosque being built at Ground Zero in NYC while ignoring the larger xenophobic issues?

I like to say that it's relational--one person at a time but there are so many people who pass by who we never take the time to speak to or to care about. We do it every day. So is being relational really the answer if we don't incorporate it into every are of our lives?

We went to Lenox Mall today to visit the Apple store. My ipod hasn't been working right which is annoying when I'm trying to run so I am ready for an upgrade. We had a snack and sat on a bench and people watched. So many people with nice clothes carrying expensive packages and they look miserable.

There are so many people and no one is telling them.

How can I tell them?

I want a solution. Our society NEEDS a solution. What do we do next?

LORD, please help me to be faithful!

Early morning here I come...!

I haven't written in a few weeks not because I have been slacking off but because I have been busy!

I've been running: I ran a 5k to raise money for the police department through downtown with my father-in-law (Daddy Jim) this past Saturday. It was fun but he beat me! We are going to run a 10k in about a month.

I've been running: I've gotten up a few times a week WAY before the sun has come up to get my outside runs in. I usually run on the treadmill which is super boring and isn't very helpful when I have to run outside for races. Since we live in the ghetto I have to drive somewhere to park and then run. This takes time. Add to that the Atlanta morning traffic and being to the office before 8:30= EARLY MORNING RUNS. It's a discipline thing for me. It's all good.

I've been running: I am still strength training twice a week (my goal) but for my cardio warm-up I am running on the treadmill.

I've been spending time planning to run: I've lived in Atlanta over a year now but haven't had much time to orientate myself to the city so when I want to go on an early morning run before work and before the heat I need to spend some time researching not only where to run but where to park. It's been pretty labor intensive figuring out the mileage and all but I think I have a good list of places to run: Ponce/Freedom Park (has to be light out though); downtown Centennial Park; Piedmont Park; Oglethorpe University; Georgia Tech, etc. I have a parking place mapped out for each location.

I've been paying attention to portions: I've simply been cooking less for meals and Andy is into being healthy with me. It's great that we can do this together.

Staying active/motivated: Andy and I have been making more time for each other with doing some form of exercise. Andy has mainly been playing sports with friends (soccer, softball, etc) but has also come to the gym with me a few times (a miracle!). This is really helping to keep me motivated. I love him.

Prayer time: I have had amazing opportunities to pray with people who are struggling recently. Today I prayed with someone who is fighting a long-standing illness; a gentleman who is homeless and trying to get housing; and another man who is homeless who is trying to get into treatment. God is so good to me and continually brings people to me to minister to. I love my job.

I've got tons to write but I am so thankful right now. God is really blessing us. I really am enjoying the job change which is nice after a difficult past year and a really difficult spring.

So--off to running I go. I need to beat an card carrying AARP old man in a 10k pretty soon...

Moving on; needing motivation

My 50 day challenge to lose some wait was a complete bust. I have actually gained a few pounds. I lost motivation somewhere.

I went to the doctor's office yesterday for a check-up on my thyroid. My TSH level is a little higher than it was a few months ago, but still in a good range. This is a praise report. I have stopped stressing about the thyroid.

I haven't, however, stopped stressing about the extra weight I am still putting on. I have gained eleven pounds since the last time I was at the doctor's office. If the thyroid has leveled off something is wrong on my end...

I workout. Granted I haven't in a few days because I've been tired and on the go at the same time. I eat...healthy? I need to get focused again with the eating part of it. Andy and I were talking about it and we came up with some action steps. He's very supportive in all of this and loves me regardless. I'm glad I married him.

This is what I am doing:

1. Run a marathon: there are a few coming up in Atlanta. The one I really want to run is on October 3rd but it isn't realistic. I don't have enough time to train and it's really hot outside. Instead I am shooting for the November one, right before Thanksgiving

2. Join a rock climbing gym: this is something that I have been thinking about for awhile now. It is expensive, but it's something that Andy and I can do together which is great because he HATES working out. We found one near Andy's parents house and took a tour.

3. Portion distortion: When I am home I prefer to cook. I am gone so often that I really do treasure being home and cooking in our tiny kitchenette. When I am not home I am running around way too busy for any sane person. As my adrenaline gets rushing so does my appetite. I need to watch my portions. I grew up in a house where we ate plenty. My dad was afraid we were going to starve so he always cooked for ten people instead of three or four. I do the same thing.

4. Make the extra effort to get to the farmer's market: I love the farmer's market but it's inconvenient. I need to get cash out, make the trek over there, and then make sure I cook up/use the food I bought in a few days....but it's worth it. It's worth the trouble, the expense, and the attention required.

5. Staying motivated: This is vague but important. Andy is helping with this. He's my cheerleader and is a great encourager. He also doesn't take my crap and tells me what I need to hear but more than him I need to motivate myself. He and a friend are going to check in with me to help keep me motivated at least twice a week.

The battle is in my mind. The marathon will be a great motivator and a great mental challenge and the planning of the other things will help.

I am looking forward to all of this and know that God is teaching me a lot through all of this.

Is it just charity and does anyone care?

I've been grappling with whether or not I am involved in a standard charity or in something impacting social change. While I hate to admit it, I think we are just another charity but I feel we should be different.

We have a "program" (program is a key sign of charity at times) where homeless men and women are welcome to come in off the streets and shower in our locker rooms and get clean clothes. They leave their dirty clothes with us and volunteers wash their laundry, ready to pick up when they come back for their next shower. We provide a small breakfast and a sitting space with a couch, etc for the guys to chat and enjoy their coffee. I lead a devotional which has just been a question of the day. We have a food pantry and a little clothing warehouse and we try to give them whatever they tell us they "need"--shoes, belt, food, razor, shaving cream, etc. It's a great thing and very much needed in the community. The methodists had a similar program in North Philly on Broad street across from my office building.

When they are finished they leave the building to go back under the bridges close by to sit and watch time go by, or drink, or figure out how they are going to get their next high, or roam the streets.

Most of them have no interest in going to a shelter, or in receiving some type of "services." They are war vets, people with mental limitations, and one fully employed executive who is living in his car. Many of them receive government checks.

If someone is interested in going to a shelter we have a "list" of places that can be called, but always with the same response. "Do you have id?" "No" "You need id to stay here." That place is crossed off the list...for medical care "Do you have id?" "No"...and on and on it goes.

If we find a shelter, i.e. our organization's shelter, and we get the $10 fee waived and the id requirement waived, we still have to figure out transportation. One of my employees drove a guy down there two weeks ago because he could barely walk.

Ids aren't really a big deal. There are "programs" that help people get their ids if they want them. Despite the very limited number of shelter beds in Atlanta, including a 400 bed shelter that is closed down for political reasons at the moment, shelter can be found if you look hard enough.

But they don't want shelter. Or ids. They want to escape from life. Life has beat them up so much that they don't want the stress--they just want to be left alone which leaves me wondering--are we really helping them? Are we making a difference, or are we "just" a charity?

About 8-10 of the guys came to our dinner before Bible Study last night with the church people and before the fight broke out one of the gentlemen quoted Isaiah 58 for us and affirmed what we were doing. After that he got himself into trouble and we had to escort him outside, but he meant well.

Are we just a charity? Who gets to decide if we are "helping" them or not--generally it's us deciding, but why?

This is what Isaiah 58:6 says:

"Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:
to loose the chains of injustice
and untie the cords of the yoke,
to set the oppressed free
and break every yoke?

7 Is it not to share your food with the hungry
and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—
when you see the naked, to clothe him,
and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?

8 Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness will go before you,
and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.

Day 30 + 1

Yesterday was day 30. Things are going well.

I have entertained a few things over the past week which include running a half marathon or re-introducing interval training into my exercise routine.

The main problem with running is that it's difficult to get running time outside since I can't run in my neighborhood and it's really, very extremely hot here. I don't do well in the heat, particularly when I am running.

I have done interval training before and I still do it when I ride the stationary bike. Introducing it more regularly into my "routine" would break the monotony up a bit and may start to yield results...I still look the same. Perhaps I always will.

Eating has been going well. I made gazpacho from scratch last night and have been eating lots of fruits and veggies. The gazpacho came out a little spicy but I am going to eat it all (I have like a gallon of it!) because I took the time to actually chop all of the vegetables before they went into the food processor. It's also nice to eat in the heat since it's a cold soup.

Andy and I had an enjoyable time visiting my brother and sister in law in Minneapolis. We saw some spectacular fireworks from the back of their condo building.

I am really enjoying the change of pace of my new job responsibilities and things are just going well. I'm happy which means I can focus on being healthy.