Balancing everything in my life seems to be a constant struggle. While I'm not back at work as of yet, I find myself agonizing over how I'm going to manage work, the baby, and Andy (who has a very demanding schedule)--all things I am committed to and love dearly. Specifically, Andy has been assigned to a place for the Christmas season that isn't close to home. He'll have an apartment up there so we won't see him much for about six weeks.
In addition to all of that I am learning that I really need "me" time. I feel kind of selfish about it, but I am much better for Andy and Elijah if I've had some time to myself. This blog is an example of "me" time but the larger example is finding time to exercise. I can't do much exercise yet, but walking is something that I love to do (until I can run again!) and fitting it into the schedule is difficult. I've only been able to walk one night this week so far.
I'm learning that I'm an over protective mother. I google just about everything (Andy says Mr. Google is raising our son) to find out what I should do or what that mark is on his skin, etc. I read several books before we had the baby but I feel that I need more information. After all, he's our only kid and I want to be a good mom. I love him too much to plead ignorance.
A decision we are contemplating right now is the pacifier vs. finger situation with the baby. What's bothering me the most is whether or not to use the pacifier (soother as our friends say) or not? What about thumb sucking? Andy thinks it's cute but I'm undecided. Also, we've been letting him suck on our fingers to soothe himself but that is not a viable solution long term. I'm sure we'll look back at this time and laugh about how silly this seems but this is where we are right now.
Balancing is all about decisions. We make decisions every day about what to eat, how to spend our time, how to treat ourselves, how to treat the people around us and whether or not we will spend quiet time with the LORD. I want a good balance in my life. Finding it is an art.
LORD--as usual I need YOU. Help me balance with consistency all of these things competing for attention in my life. Help me to recognize that I need you primarily and to trust that you will take care of everything else.
