The Cost of Discipleship: Discipleship and the Individual

Through the call of Christ men become individuals. Every man is called separately, and must follow alone.

For some reason we are afraid of solitude. We often equate solitude with loneliness even though they are quite different from one another.

A barrier is set up between a person and their natural life once they become a believer. Life looks differently and our response to life, and even to what reality actually is, must reflect that reality.

Christ came between man and the natural life in His incarnation. The call of Christ brings individuals face to face with the Mediator.

"The call of Jesus teaches us that our relation to the world has been built on an illusion"

"For the Christian the only God-given realities are those he receives from Christ.

Following Christ means a change in situation. Now everything must pass through Christ. While the outward appearance may look the same, the inward is completely different.

We enter into discipleship alone but are not lonely. We have the fellowship of the Church.

The Cost of Discipleship: Discipleship and the cross

Jesus suffered and was rejected in fulfillment of the scriptures. Discipleship, as submission to the law of Christ, means that we who call ourselves disciples must also suffer.

Discipleship means adherence to the person of Jesus, and therefore submission to the law of Christ. In other words, it means the cross. This cross, according to Christopher Wright in Mission of God, is the key to history. This cross (in Revelation) is redemptive, universal, victorious. It is powerful. Perfect. Complete.

An individual comes to a turning/decision point (crisis of belief) where they must decide if they are going to truly be disciples ("suffer") or play a game with God mocked in whatever cloaks we use in the Church to keep things comfortable and surface.

To know Christ means to know only him. The idea of self-denial is to know Christ as we cease to know our fleshly selves.

We are to bear the cross for His sake.

For me, some of the imagery attached with this is uncomfortable. Sounds like religious fanaticism on some levels, but that is exactly what it is.

All in. Everything. Totally surrendered and available.

The cross is the call to abandon attachments. We surrender in unity with Christ's death.

This is just crazy talk to those who do not believe. For those who do, their total allegiance is to the cause of Christ.

"Suffering means being cut off from God. Therefore those who live in communion with Him cannot really suffer"

Suffering has to be endured in order that it may pass away.

Lots to ponder and sort out.

The Call to Discipleship: Spontaneous Obedience

(From The Cost of Discipleship by Bonhoeffer, chapter 2 notes)

The call goes forth and is followed by a response of obedience. The response is an act of obedience and not a confession of faith.

It is Jesus who calls. Notice that Jesus/the Bible never praises a disciple for obeying the call. The call goes forth and one is obedient to that call.

Discipleship is obedience. Without obedience, there is no discipleship.

A disciple must be willing to leave all for the sake of the call.

"Discipleship means Jesus Christ, and Him alone. It cannot consist of anything more than that."

Only God calls people to follow.

There are different types of disciples when reduced to human understanding:

1. Those who want to follow without being called (this person does not know what they are doing).

2. Those who want to follow, but the law (obligation) get in the way (Jesus says "just follow"...no excuses)

3. Those who want  to follow on their own terms.  He wants to follow, but has his own conditions and terms.
"This disciple places himself at the Master's disposal, but at the same times retains the right to dictate his own terms. But then discipleship is no longer discipleship, but a programme of our own to be arranged to suit ourselves, and to be judged in accordance with the standards of a rational ethic."

Wow....this one could say a lot about Salvation Army officership and the conditions that are placed upon the Army in order for people to "fulfill" their call to full-time ministry in the Army context.

To follow:
The past is the past. The call to follow Jesus produces a "now" situation.

To follow brings one into fellowship with Jesus and binds him to Christ alone.

To follow makes faith possible. Lots of people hear the call, but do not obey. The call vanishes without obedience/following.

Discipleship is not an offer one makes to Christ.

Only he who believes is obedient, and only he who is obedient believes.
When you are disobedient you are trying to keep part of your life under your own control. You cannot hear Christ when you are willfully disobedient.

First, faith, then obedience. For faith is only real when there is obedience. Faith only becomes faith in the act of obedience.

Lots of people think they believe but lack obedience. They are not disciples.

"Unbelief thrives on cheap grace, for it is determined to persist in disobedience" (pg.60).

The devil hides under the cloak of cheap grace.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The commitment issue. Jesus is not interested in excuses or in problems, but in the person. Difficulties show disobedience. Doubt and reflection take the place of spontaneous obedience.

The call to discipleship requires spontaneous obedience.

The Cost of Discipleship: Costly Grace

I am reading through some classics in an effort to focus on my inward spiritual journey in addition to my regular Bible study (Isaiah right now) and reading (Every Day with Jesus Daily Bible--our entire congregation is reading this).

Many years ago I read Bonhoeffer's 'The Cost of Discipleship' but I believe it deserves a re-visit.

“Discipleship is joy.”

I’ve never really thought about discipleship in this way before but if you stop to think about it, it is absolutely true. Discipleship should be a joy for us as we journey and grow closer to the LORD. I am hoping to remember this description of discipleship and use it.

Bonhoeffer starts off the book talking about how the Church has become to manmade and makes it difficult and confusing for people to truly follow Jesus. People end up replacing one burden with another.

For the Church to be successful, our quest needs to be Jesus Himself and what He is saying to us. Our preaching and teaching needs to be focused on the Scripture and not on superfluous church-ease.

Cheap Grace

p.37 “ cheap grace is the deadly enemy of our Church. We are fighting today for costly grace.”

Cheap grace amounts to a denial to the living word of God

Cheap grace is the justification of sin without the justification of the sinner

Cheap grace is grace without discipleship

First and last words Jesus spoke to Peter were “follow Me.” Inbetween were a life of discipleship.

Christian double standard= maximum and minimum standard of obedience

Cheap grace is thinking we can live as before and use grace as the card to allow it. This has led to the mass secularization of Christianity around the world. Real grace is real costly.

Cheap grace is the bitterest foe of all discipleship

The grace and the call to follow are inseparable.

Grace as a principle versus grace as a living word. Difference between cheap and costly grace.

“discipleship means life that springs from grace, and that grace simply means discipleship”

Wow. There’s a lot to take in. Basically to live as a true Christian one must be willing to accept the grace that He has for us by giving up everything. It is for very few and is very costly, but by doing so one can find true life. The mass secularization of Christianity has cheapened this idea of grace so much that it is essentially raped as a way for people justify what they are doing (sins) rather than truly justify themselves (the sinner). The focus is kept on the action rather than the heart. True grace, real grace, is a matter of the heart.

"When it rains, it pours"

Today I have heard the phrase "when it rains, it pours" several times in reference to our thrift store warehouse being burglarized. The vandals took an estimated $10,000 worth of ready-for-the-store merchandise, mainly all of our furniture. They looted through a fifteen foot high mountain of bags of clothing taking most of it, too, with them. They pilfered through boxes upon boxes of housewares and took most of that, too. They left an awful mess that can only be described as, one employee put it, "a tornado went through here." The appliances, both large and small are gone. They even took the scrap metal and the refrigerator that had employee lunches in it.

I called our headquarters to fill them in on what was going on and the response was "when it rains, it pours for you."

My mother-in-law in a text: "when it rains, it pours."

An employee in conversation this afternoon: "when it rains, it pours."

A dear officer friend who called and left me a voicemail: "when it rains, it pours."

When the bad storm back at the end of June blew the roof off of our thrift store the oft repeated phrase was, "when it rains, it pours."

Oddly enough I was thinking about this phrase during my morning devotion time. Our church community is reading through the Bible in a year and we all have the same daily Bibles. One of today's passages was about Noah and THE flood. I was struck by a verse that says (Gen 7:17) basically that the rain kept coming and lifted the ark above the Earth. I sat on that verse for a moment and tried to visualize it. That's when the phrase came to mind.

And it got me wondering. How high did the ark get lifted up? I believe it was above the highest mountains as there was so much water, but how HIGH? My four year old Elijah is absolutely fascinated with outer space so it got me wondering...did the ark reach space? How high above the earth did God put the boat?

Sometimes we go through things that we cannot control. I continually refer to a young adult that "adult life happens." It happens to the best of us. For some, the water just reaching land is high enough. For others, the tops of mountains and yet, for others, outerspace perhaps. For some, when it rains, it truly pours.

Church was AMAZING yesterday. You know, the good kind of church where you get Holy Spirit goose bumps and tears flow and the body is worshiping together and you don't want it to end and it is just wonderful. We had one of those days after a very trying (and immature on my part) first part of the morning. God moved. We invited Him and He came. It. Was. Glorious!!!

And then, the rain begins again. And it poured a little bit today.

Stuff can be replaced. The soul work that happened in the chapel yesterday cannot.

So I'll take a mess to clean up in an inconveniently located warehouse any day. And as I do, I will sing this song (Embrace by Jake Hamilton):

I want to feel Your embrace
I want to feel Your arms around
I want to feel Your heart beating
Next to mine, next to mine

And it's telling me

It's all gonna be okay
It's all gonna be okay
It's all gonna be okay
It's all gonna be okay

I want to see You Your face
Want to see who I can be
Want to see what You can see
In the mirror of Your eyes

And You're telling me

It's all gonna be okay
It's all gonna be okay
It's all gonna be okay
It's all gonna be okay

And I know, if Your eye is on the sparrow
Than Your heart is on me

And I don't have to wait
To go to heaven when I die
I wanna go right now
We're gonna go right now

'Cause this is the sound of heaven
Invading earth, this is the sound

Bittersweet/"My covenant"

Who blogs anymore?

I think it is slightly depressing that this began as an experiment in 2007 and here we are about to start 2016 and this still exists and people still read it. At the same time, it is also exciting. I committed to a group of friends to do this so that they could keep track of my journey through officership. I have kept that commitment.

Through seasons I have used this to chart different things in my life in my walk with God, in my personal wellness, and in the comings and goings of life.

2015 has been a bittersweet year. Sadly, probably more bitter than sweet. There was disappointment on several different fronts. There was shock. There was sadness.

And there was a new baby brought into our lives. Our youngest. Had he been born first, he would be our only child... It took eight months to figure out that the poor kid is allergic to eggs and is a HOMEBODY. Benjamin doesn't like to sleep anywhere except his crib which can, at times, be quite frustrating as it parks me at home a lot, but has also been a blessing. I need to be at home. This season in my life will never come again. I am learning to embrace it and enjoy the quietness that comes when Benjamin is napping and the dishwasher is humming away. Thankfully most of my work can be done via laptop and I have found that setting up office at our kitchen table is much more productive than the distractions of being an extrovert in the office.

A professor friend of mine here in town, whom I admire and consider to be wise and balanced, told me several months ago that she never makes resolutions for what she is going to add or do in the new year. Instead, she spends time reflecting and generates a list of what she is going to cut out each year. I've seen some people do this and give up things like "complaining" (which--being quite transparent and vulnerable--I probably could NOT do--ha!) and "people pleasing." Hers is different. She makes a list of 5-7 physical, practical things that she is going to give up and then she does it. Every year. She's done it for about ten years and says that she enjoys life so much now because she has a lot more control over her time and what she's doing (she's an extremely busy lady professionally). For example, she decided a few years ago that she doesn't like cleaning her house. So she put that on her "Do not do" list and hired someone to do it. While I don't have that luxury, she does and doesn't regret it. Now she can spend time leisurely reading where she once was cleaning her house.

So I've been reflecting for the past several weeks over this past year and over what I picture 2016 to look like. I know it is going to be a better year as I can sense in my Spirit that God is moving in my heart and has been pushing me to rely on Him more and not my own grit. God is in control. He has already written the pages for this year. I just want to be a part of His story. I have no "do not do" list. What I do have, I reflect upon here and challenge those of you who have made the same covenant to make it real for 2016:

MY COVENANT CALLED BY GOD to proclaim the Gospel of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ as an officer of The Salvation Army I BIND MYSELF TO HIM IN THIS SOLEMN COVENANT
	to love and serve him supremely all my days, to live to win souls and make their salvation the first purpose of my life, to care for the poor, feed the hungry, clothe the naked, love the unlovable, and befriend those who have no friends, to maintain the doctrines and principles of The Salvation Army, and, by God's grace to prove myself a worthy officer.

In God's grace, it can be done. Happy New Year.

Release for peace

A dear friend of mine was "promoted to glory" and I have the privilege of conducting her service today.

I find that I am tired of death. Of sadness.

A very pregnant me in the end of March sat and held the hand of a soldier dying slowly over a painfully long week for his family. For months we knew this was coming but when it did it felt so slow for all of us. All were waiting for release--for peace.

When he did pass I sat with him alone in his room looking at him knowing that just his body was there and that his soul had already gone on to be with the LORD. I read scripture over him and prayed with his family and stood guard in the room alone with the person tasked with taking his body. I watched as he prepared to cover him up and take him on his way. As the body left I dropped back to stand and watch with the family eventually shuffling them away from the sight as we hugged and prayed some more. We were all waiting for release--for peace.

A few weeks later my phone rang early in the morning alerting me to the fact that my 56 year old mom was unexpectedly on a respirator (which she did not want!) and sorting through the next few days was difficult. I watched her take her last breath via facetime with a dear friend as my contractions to have baby Benjamin were already in full force. The entire time all of us felt like we were just holding our breath. Those hours we were waiting for release--for peace.

Benjamin was finally born a couple days later and the joy of finally having him born was mixed with so much raw emotion. In fact, I only stayed in the hospital one night because I could not handle being there as the emotions of losing my mom were too fresh. The wound too ripe. The joy of our new baby was being robbed from me. The midwife understood and the doctor released me, thankfully. Such a bittersweet time for me!

We came home to Andy's mom loving on us, but it was too short. She had to leave and return back to her life and it was like a wound ripped wide open in me that I did not even know was there! I love my mother-in-law so much that I don't think she will ever fully understand how much I appreciate her and how she loves my family.

I started to feel better.

And then our thrift store that we built from the ground up was completely destroyed in an awful storm. The roof ripped right off and with it--my heart. Someone on our staff said that he thought losing the store for me was like losing my firstborn child. As I reflected I realized there was some truth in that. Ouch.

In these situations and a few others there were times when I felt like there was no person to turn to. Of course, we have the LORD and I have a couple of good friends, but no one to hold me and let me cry. I needed a mom. I have learned who my true friends are and have learned again to rely on the LORD to hold me as I cry. I have learned that many on our staff are family to me and me to them and I love them dearly.

The funeral today is of a soldier who was such a committed prayer warrior for her family, for our corps and for me--a true friend. She told me things that I did not know about the spiritual life and, in her own special way, was a Godsend. I will miss combing her hair, helping her get dressed, fetching her cold tea, listening to old stories of the war and of life as a girl in England. I will miss our Friday afternoons spent in her small apartment as she was always ready to "go to battle" in her uniform. She was a dear, special lady and as I prepare for her memorial service today I now realize that I am rejoicing that a true friend has gone to be with Jesus.

No more death. No more sadness. Just release for peace.