God's goal is not to make us happy, but rather, holy.
I heard a woman in my Bible Study at a local church say this a few weeks ago and I wrote it down and have been internalizing it ever since.
It's true.
God's goal--above happiness--is holiness. That is what he wants for his people but is it what we want from him? We expect God to be holy but when he works on making us holy and it gets a little uncomfortable we revert to the ideal that we should be "happy."
This idea--myth really--of work-life balance does not exist. Everything vying for my time and attention is really a priority whether it is corps business, the Family Store, Elijah, Andy, corps people, my "me" time (haha!), and being there for Zi during this transition time in her life. Oh yeah--let me not forget my HEBREW class as I picked up working toward my MDiv this fall after putting it down for two years just as I got accepted to an executive leadership class locally through the businesswoman's organization that I belong to. All of this happened at the same time. Whoops.
There were a few other things but I did sift through them and put them on a back burner for now.
Where is the time to work on making me holy?
Did I just schedule God out of my life?
No, I did not. I have had to realize what is essential versus what I perceive as a priority.
Elijah and I attending Bible Study at a local church on Wednesdays during the day together is essential. So we do. Even this morning when he woke up at 5:00am just as I was creeping out the door for the gym. So, no gym time for me today but as he is singing happily eating breakfast as I type this my time with him as we watch the sunrise and then get ready for Bible Study is essential.
Living incarnationally in my house with an 18 year old girl who has literally lost everything she has ever known and is trying to put the pieces back together is more important than knitting a hat and scarf.
Spending time with my corps ladies as we try to build relationships with women in the shelter is more important than getting an A in Hebrew.
Working alongside our Family Store manager is more essential than answering e-mails immediately as he needs encouragement.
Missing the gym this morning so that Andy can sleep as I hang out with Elijah is the right decision.
Essentials. Holiness. In all parts of everyday life.
